"My lack of ethnocentricity denies my ethnicity."
Kathy Cannon is passionate about her calling from God to increase the level of authentic relationships and relevant teaching in the Church today. Her goal is to be an amazing disciple, wife to Ben, mom, friend, follower & leader. She currently serves as a pastor with an amazing team of people at Mars Hill Community Church in Sacramento, CA and thanks the Father daily for moving this East-Coast girl from Appalachia to California. Ben and Kathy are now becoming parents through the fost-adopt system of 3 amazing children.
First he came inside to tell me he bumped his head. When instructed to go back outside (he was wet and muddy from playing) and sit to rest his head (obviously there was no crying or bleeding), he said, “I work it out.” (This is what they’re told to do when there’s sibling rivalry.) He returned just 60 seconds later with this announcement:
“God say yes.”
“Oh… did you ask God to make it feel better?” Totally guessing.
“Yes. And God say yes.”
I love Little Man.
Little Man: Why was mommy in your class?
The Little Missy: Because she was teaching people about God.
Little Man: Why was she teaching people about God?
The Little Missy: Because she’s a pastor.
Little Man: Why’s mommy a pastor?
The Little Missy: I have NO idea.
At this point… I totally lost it.
Since I posted a list last year with 20 shopping days left, I thought I better hurry up and update it since you only have FOUR days!!! My Birthday is Wednesday and our anniversary is Friday. :o)
Pasted from last year’s and updated for your convenience:
Did I mention that my love languages are gifts and words of affirmation? And I feel like words of affirmation (like well-written greeting cards) are gifts to my heart… so guess which one’s the primarily language?
Here’s what you can get me:
Okay, well that should at least get you started, right?
The new house required a team of worker bees to transform it from double-wide to indoor/outdoor masterpiece.
(Photo: Jacqueline Schellingerhout; Dwell)
Today however, was the first one of those seven that involved happy tears. For years I’ve struggled on Mom’s Day, and today, even though my happy tears, I was thinking of my friends who still may cry sad tears.
It’s an excruciating thing to be caught up in - the lack of motherhood. For many we’ve had to grieve our own lack of being a mommy, and for others, you may grieve the lack of having your mommy, or perhaps of having a healthy relationship with your mom. Know that today, I was thinking of you and praying for you.
And then… God spoke to my heart. You see, this was all processing during our worship service at Mars Hill, and as we sang, “Jehovah Jireh, my provider, Jehovah Nissi, Lord You reign in victory,” that louder than audible voice said,
“It’s not about the title you didn’t have. And it’s not about the title you just got. Because it’s not about what anyone else calls you. It’s about what you call Me. It’s about My titles. My Names. Who I Am.”
And I know that I now sit in the blessed spot where I’m crying the happy tears and not really waiting anymore - and many have waited longer than me, or are still just starting the crying process and have no clue if/when it will end… But I do know that through it all, God will still speak His Name to each one of us.
So I sang His name, His titles, a little louder.
Sing with me tonight.
Today we had to say “good-bye for now” to our kiddos, as we come home and give them some transition adjustment time. Over the next four days their foster parents will continue to read through their photo books we gave them and talk about Daddy Ben and Mommy Kathy being their “forever family.” On Tuesday we’ll pick them up and come back to Sac’to for a few days, then have the heart-wrenching job of taking them back again. All of this is part of a plan to allow them to ask questions, learn us, their new home, and also be able to say good-bye to the old one. Then the current plan is that on Monday, April 26, we pick them up “for good!”
I love the write and describe the emotions I’m processing, but it’s been such the adventurous roller coaster for the past few days that for now I’ll just stick with the facts. I’m sure I’ll get back to the other stuff later. :o)
For those who have been asking - Because we are adopting through the foster-care system here in California, our kids will technically still be foster children for at least the first six months in our home. After that we’ll put all of the paperwork through for adoption. Until adoption finalization, we are unfortunately unable to share their pictures or names online. So until that day…
The Little Missy - our daughter is 4 years old
Little Man - our middle child is precious boy who will be 3 in June
Young One - the baby is a 21 month old little boy
We love you all! Thanks for all of your love, prayers and support!
Today I cried because of my joy. But it wasn’t what you think - where I was so happy, feeling so blessed, that “happy tears” came to my eyes. No, they were most definitely “sad tears.” Because my joy, my blessing, was bringing tears to the eyes of others.
One of the hurdles in adoption is that you usually only see one side of it. And as adoptive parents, your constant thought is, “I’m getting my kids!” But this afternoon, we were exposed to the feelings of others, very honest and very real - and I was reminded that my ‘getting’ also means I am ‘taking.’
There are many people in my children’s lives that are ready to love them. And there are also many people in my children’s’ lives that already love them. There are foster parents, therapists, workers, and of course birth/first family, and they all love my kids. And as deeply as I feel in my heart that these are my children… my children have also been their children. And wanting the best for my kids means they are gracefully allowing us to invade the picture they have painted, and choose to add a few bold strokes of our own.
Respecting that, honoring that, and being sensitive to that is something Ben and I will always have to navigate. I guess I just wasn’t expecting to work through it today, in the middle of speech therapy.
I thank God minute by minute that not only can He can comfort my heart as I wait for final move-in, He can supernaturally touch the hearts of others as they process move-out.
